English Is Broken - Harrison McCall #19

You can have goose and geese and a box and boxes, but as soon as you make it moose and meese and an ox and oxes it's wrong. Mouse goes to mice, but mice live in houses, not hice. The house burns up while it burns down. Then the masculine pronouns are he, his and him, but the feminine, she, shis, and shim? English muffins weren't invented in England or French fries in France. Quicksand works slowly, boxing rings are square and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it? Is it an odd, or an end? How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites? This just shows how confusing the English language is. Many other words are confusing but may favorite is buffalo, because it allows the best sentence in our language to exist. Buffalo buffalo, Buffalo buffalo buffalo, buffalo Buffalo buffalo. Yeah, that's right. That is a grammatically correct sentence in American English. It uses three meanings of the word buffalo. It uses the proper noun Buffalo as in Buffalo, New York. It uses the noun buffalo as in what we commonly call bison in North America. Finally, it uses buffalo as the verb that means to bully or push around. The sentence would read that Buffalo buffalo (bison from Buffalo, New York), Buffalo buffalo buffalo (this is a clause that states the bison from Buffalo are bullied by other bison from Buffalo, New York), buffalo Buffalo buffalo (bully bison from Buffalo, New York). So the bison from Buffalo that are bullied by bison from Buffalo bully bison from Buffalo. English was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the creativity of the human race, which, of course, is not a race at all.